What is the best age to get married?

Discussion in 'The Pavilion' started by Del, Jan 15, 2019.

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  1. Del
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    Del Cornered Tiger

    Dec 21, 2016
    10,926
    Title says it all, is there an ideal age for both men and women to get married in your opinion?

    I think one needs to ask himself/herself the following questions, while taking decision for marriage and he/she can tick most the boxes, then congrats, you're ready (in my opinion).
    1. Whenever you think now you have forgotten your ex. (applicable for both) and ready for a serious & long-term relationship.
    2. Whenever you think you are ready to take some responsibilities.
    3. Whenever you can financially support your wife and your separate home.
    4. Whenever you are mature enough to support her though thick and thin.
    5. Whenever you think you can take a stand for your wife in front of your parents and siblings.
    6. Whenever you think you can give up some bad habits for someone's love.
    7. Whenever you think you are tired up from these flirts, girlfriends, lusts and all other distractions.
    I am writing this answer based on personal experience, So don't take me wrong. Well If whether you are a boy or a girl and if you are not fulfilling all of the above points. Still, that is okay but please be ready to adapt and learn these qualities.

    That said, in your opinion, when is the right time to get married?
     
  2. isaacking
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    isaacking Talented

    Jul 16, 2010
    2,212
    Rite age as per country, region or religion?

    Rite age as per strength, desire or capability?

    There are no uniform answer to suit all. Age is a number which means zero is reality.

    Just remember that ull get married when it is ordained for u.

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  3. Del
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    Del Cornered Tiger

    Dec 21, 2016
    10,926
    Based on your opinion or experience and not based on those factors.
     
  4. isaacking
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    isaacking Talented

    Jul 16, 2010
    2,212
    If u fear Allah and have control than u can delay till say late 20s. If u can't control then late teens.

    But ideal age will be 25 which is sunnah.

    For girl ideal age should b late teen or early 20s, simply bcoz in 30s it is hard to conceive without medical help.

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  5. ElRaja
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    ElRaja Talented

    Jan 12, 2013
    2,778
    i dont disagree with you but not for your rationale, conceiving is harder compared to a teen, but not hard. plenty of women have natural pregnancies in their 30s. its fairly do able till 36, 37 if your healthy, trouble increases nearer 40.

    i just think women, and perhaps people in general become far too cynical in their 30s, the difference tho, which possible down to your reasoning is, that women who wants to have kids most definitely start hearing the clock tick around 32, 33 and then u can tell some may be forcing the issue.

    i think ideally a woman who wants kids should get married young so that if she wants a career, thats something she can still persue in her late 20s, when the kids no longer need 24 hour overwatch. when career women have kids in their 30s it pretty much derails their careers, esp if they want more than one kid.
     
  6. Patriot
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    Patriot Kaptaan

    Oct 8, 2014
    25,203
    around 40 I would say
     
  7. isaacking
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    isaacking Talented

    Jul 16, 2010
    2,212
    Sir i have worked in field of pharma and know a bit more abt it.

    Hence i said hard not impossible.

    Rest is ur view against mine, let it be that and move on.

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  8. ASLI-PATHAN
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    ASLI-PATHAN Cricistan Khan

    Apr 26, 2011
    63,321
    Ideal age for marriage is early 20's.
     
  9. Fireworks11
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    Fireworks11 Kaptaan

    Sep 22, 2012
    30,478
    There is no ideal age as every story/situation is different however generally speaking early to mid 20s is a good age to get married and settle down.
     
  10. Del
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    Del Cornered Tiger

    Dec 21, 2016
    10,926
    Hum pehali shaadi discuss ker raha hain bhai, 3rd nahi.

    upload_2019-1-16_15-17-56.png
     
    Last edited: Jan 16, 2019
  11. Del
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    Del Cornered Tiger

    Dec 21, 2016
    10,926
    The pattern which I have seen here in Canada is that, first ladies try to establish themselves and then indulge in long term relationship and family. Average age (which I have observe) is early to late 30's and reason is simple (have this discussion with many). They want to be well establish first, so that in case of crises, in case of being single mom, they can support themselves and their kid(s), and being single mom and raising kids is very norm in west (I am sure you would know this).

    As for conceiving, yes, no question that its easier in young age, but these days we have so many fidelity options available, people become parents even in their 40's, so having kids is not that difficult.
     
  12. Del
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    Del Cornered Tiger

    Dec 21, 2016
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    And you think its practice to be on your own, have your own place, be strong financially to start your family and shoulder new responsibilities?
     
  13. Munna
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    Munna Moderator-e-Aala

    Oct 4, 2014
    27,508
    Age wage se kuch nahi hota.... mard ka dil jawaan hona chahiye, aur larki bhi
     
  14. Del
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    Del Cornered Tiger

    Dec 21, 2016
    10,926
    upload_2019-1-16_14-3-19.png
     
  15. Del
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    Del Cornered Tiger

    Dec 21, 2016
    10,926
  16. Fireworks11
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    Fireworks11 Kaptaan

    Sep 22, 2012
    30,478
    LOL
     
  17. Energy
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    Energy Cornered Tiger

    Apr 22, 2012
    10,364
    When you can provide for the family.
     
  18. Savak
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    Savak Emerging Player

    Feb 26, 2013
    945
    Whatever age you find the right person
     
  19. mohsin88ali
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    mohsin88ali Talented

    Nov 8, 2017
    1,248
    Age is nothing but a number.
    In my opinion, if one meets certain requirements they CAN marry young, like in their teenage. (If they have big inheritance)

    The one thing which i value more than everything, is mental maturity.

    They must also be able to make decisions for themselves. Because once you are married, your family, your home, will require you to make decisions, sometimes big, sometimes small. All that will be on YOU. If you are not ready for it, you can get overwhelmed.

    The goal/reason of WHY you want to get married, must also be clear. Some popular ones are.
    Safe (and legal) sex option.
    Children.

    My good friend @Del has made some good points in his OP, with which i fully agree.



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  20. Mohammed Bilal
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    Mohammed Bilal Tracer Bullet

    Jul 17, 2017
    6,980
    Do most wife swear at husbands mother?

    Most they do I think so it’s important that you are mature I guess?
     
  21. Inswinger
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    Inswinger Tracer Bullet

    Mar 6, 2010
    7,152
    I got married at 25 and I think that was the perfect age for me. But there is no magical number as everyone's situation is different.
     
  22. isaacking
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    isaacking Talented

    Jul 16, 2010
    2,212
    25 yrs sunnah and for me that is best time to marry.

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  23. Del
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    Del Cornered Tiger

    Dec 21, 2016
    10,926
    Thank bro and it didnt occur to me at all - decision making. Which is very vital.

    Another aspect I think is flexibility, I have seen bad things happen in relationships only because one of the partner was too stubborn.
     
  24. mohsin88ali
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    mohsin88ali Talented

    Nov 8, 2017
    1,248
    You are welcome.

    And flexibility is a must, not only in marriage, but also in other relationships as well.

    Like how parents need to be flexible in the way they treat their children...
    And vice versa.



    Sent from knowhere.
     
  25. mohsin88ali
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    mohsin88ali Talented

    Nov 8, 2017
    1,248
    You know, if it were up to me, i would implement some rules/tests to prepare the bride and groom for their new life.

    Most of our women just don't realize what trouble we (the men) go through when we "earn". So, i would suggest for the bride to get a job , for at least six months before the marriage.

    Similarly, men also take women for granted when it comes to house chores.
    Groom would spend one week every month, six months before the marriage.

    Living on a budget is a big problem.
    The bride should share a room of her own house with a sister or some girl cousin.
    She should get exact amount per month as her groom to be makes, and asked to run their "house" using only that.

    When they think about having a child, they should be asked to "parent" a baby from one of their families for a month. So that both have an ACTUAL idea about what they are getting themselves into.

    Those are just at the top of my head.

    Sent from knowhere.
     
  26. Don Corleone
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    Don Corleone Kaptaan

    Jul 20, 2012
    29,447
    Stop watching Pakistani/Indian TV serials.
     
  27. Mohammed Bilal
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    Mohammed Bilal Tracer Bullet

    Jul 17, 2017
    6,980
    I don’t watch them, my mum told me about this incident that happened in Pak and was on the news where mother in law said someone else’s baby was more beautiful than her baby, I mean that would drive me up the wall if someone said that to me so she decided to kill the better looking baby, it does happen, why would I watch Pakistan tv serials? lol
     
  28. KingOfDoosra
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    KingOfDoosra Sultan of Swing

    Jun 8, 2012
    17,030
    When you are mature and responsible
     

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